Sometimes the love is just gone and you are done. Too many late nights, sacrificed family moments, ungrateful clients, stilted work, you name it. Of course, if you can fix all of the ills of the business, perhaps there is a there there. I am not talking about that today. No, today is when the decision is made, when it is time to move on.
A few thoughts. First, there is no shame when you are done. Give yourself permission to just let go and know the moment has passed for you. For so many of us, the voices in our heads will be screaming to not give up, to keep whatever is left, to be terrified to the point of inertia about what might come next. Of course, there will be voices outside of your head too offering their “wisdom” on why you are an idiot/fool/loser/fill in any other derogative thought for quitting. Do not ignore them. Hear them, let it move through you and then let their perspective return to them. If you ignore them, their voices will only get louder. If you have come to the place where you are no longer fueled by your art, can not be responsible for the joy of transformation you are tasked with, you are doing a disservice to everyone (you, your clients, employees, colleagues) by continuing. Creative business has no place for those who are willing to just mail it in and you will get run over much sooner than later by those who are not. That helps no one.
Next, be done. Most likely you have continuing obligations, maybe even some assets that have to be taken care of. Shutting down is not selling and do not make that mistake. Shutting down means having a date certain with specific tasks that you will perform to meet that date. Of course, people’s noses are going to be out of joint — you are bailing on them. So focus on what remains to be the most valuable thing you can do to leave well and just do that more than you otherwise would. The rest let be.
Yes, if you are at the final production stage of things, you have to finish. Short of that though, say if you are still really getting ready, you must understand that the promise you made when you first started has now been broken. Production partners must move on to those that will sustain their business. These businesses will get the “favors” you once got because you do not matter any more. That is not to say your partners will not do well by you but we all expect the extra mile and it just will not be there. Also, how much will you be willing to sacrifice everything when you are gone tomorrow? Sure, your professionalism and integrity exists but only to a point. You are moving on after all. If possible, outsource your production to those who will carry your vision forward. This might mean more effort to communicate your vision than ever before, so be it.
Last, if you are fortunate enough to be able to afford some time to ponder what is next, please please take advantage of the opportunity. Of course, there are legions of self-help resources to provide avenues for personal improvement and a recapture of the love and enthusiasm you once had for your art. I am talking about something else, the idea that you simply do not know what is to come next. Go take an improv class so you can see what can unfold as you are focused on being present. Again, if it is possible, give yourself a date in the future when you will be willing consider what is next. Between now and then be fierce in your commitment to just not know. Whoever might ask, the answer is that you will let them know when you know.
The freedom to be done is the very freedom you will need to find the new thing, the new expression of your art. Art always transcends its medium and as you find your way you will discover the thing you love enough for the inevitable sacrifice that the love will require. What will never happen is that you will cease being an artist. That will only happen if you can never come back to center. The irony of ironies is that you are letting go, choosing to be lost with no guarantee what might be, you will inevitably find your center. You will regain the ability to be fierce in the fight, absolute in your conviction. And we will all be better for the effort. The world needs you to be remarkable, willing to do remarkable things for those that care enough to welcome the effort.
